“At times like these God is useless…” – quote from a Minister at a church service in NYC held the evening of Sept. 11, 2001.
That statement may seem harsh, caustic, and even reminiscent of the once famous proclamation of God being dead. But that is far from the truth. Rather, to me, it speaks to a rawness of truth that people who have been through tragedy can relate to, and often need to hear.
One of the biggest obstacles – when we try to experience spirituality and a relationship with God (in recovery) – our images of God are sometimes the greatest barriers to the relationship.
I have discovered that most people believe in a God who has an “EGO” – because only a God with an ego would get “mad” or seek revenge or rain down judgment or have his divine feelings hurt if I spoke some personal truth in anger towards him.
I have actually had people judge me and tell me I have lost faith all because I tell them that when I pray I sometimes cuss, that I rage at God when I pray because that is who I am; I am being true to the man God made, and yet somehow I am supposed to NOT be human towards God? I am also being true to the depth of realness in my relationship with God.
Let me state this as simply as possible, this ‘thing’ that transformed my relationship with God making it more real and authentic than at any time in my life is this change within me: I came to understand and “know” that God does not have an Ego.
Ego is defined as a “person’s sense of self-importance or self-esteem.” In psychoanalysis, ego has to do with the role the “mind” plays in mediating between the conscious and unconscious mind. See where I am going with this?
God does not need or have a “sense of self-importance” for God is self-contained – utterly whole and complete – the Power Greater Than myself. God does not need anything. God does not need me to placate his feelings with trite remarks of praise. God does not need anything from me, at all. Nada. God does not have a Mind that needs a mediating element. God does not need a mind. God just is. God is the all that is and that is all.